Why is it so difficult to look at our own work and say, “I crushed it?”
I know so many leaders (and female leaders, in particular) who dismiss their own work as no big deal.
“You closed a huge account.” No biggie.
“You launched a complex project, on time and under budget.” NBD.
“You just solved world hunger.” Meh. Could’ve done more. 🤷🏼♀️
We know women often receive less recognition for their work. There are a number of reasons for that—unconscious bias, among them.
Women face a double-bind when highlighting their own performance. Say too much and you’re self-promoting (that’s bad, apparently?). Say too little and get passed over for promotion because your manager isn’t able to articulate the value you bring.
And then there’s this:
Harvard research found that even when women and men know they performed equally well (both answering 15 out of 20 questions correctly), women describe their performance less favorably than men. ~The Harvard Gazette
It's really difficult to get recognition from others if you’re not even willing to give it to yourself. Like damn near impossible.
So if you’re writing off your wins as NBD, I challenge you to spend five minutes weekly noting one thing you’re proud of. Here are prompts to help:
This week I'm proud that I [specific accomplishment].
This mattered because [impact/who benefited].
The value I brought was [unique contribution/skill used].
This is worth recognizing because [why it matters].
Accomplishments don’t need to be earth-shattering to be worth acknowledging and celebrating.
Solving a data integration challenge will do. So will negotiating a tough vendor contract. Leading your first all-hands. Receiving positive participant feedback on a training session. Or getting buy-in from that skeptical stakeholder.
Sometimes, building more recognition for your work begins with you. Own the value you bring, and you make it easier for others to see it too.
So the next time someone says, “Wow, that was impressive,” feel free to say: “Thanks. It was.”
Bonus reads: It’s time we all get a little more comfortable recognizing our worth—and graciously receiving others’ recognition, too.
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