PTO ... on a Monday?
Why does taking a Monday off feel so indulgent?
Monday, May 4 was my first wedding anniversary and I took the day off.
My wife and I didn’t have grand plans—no weekend getaway or fancy dinner, no activities reserved months in advance.
We walked around the lake where we first met and later got married. Had breakfast at a local cafe. Went to a coffee shop and wrote. Enjoyed a sunny, 79-degree Seattle day and each other’s company without any pressure to go anywhere or do any specific thing.
It felt luxurious to walk around without a care in the world at 9 a.m. on a Monday morning, while the rest of the world worked.
Monday, Monday
I can’t remember the last time I took my birthday or other personally important day off. Maybe never?
Even if I had, there’s little chance it would have been on a Monday.
Mondays set the tone for the week ahead. Miss a Monday when everyone else works and you start your week ridiculously behind.
In my current role, we hold our go-to-market team meeting on Mondays. Our weekly all-company stand-up covers plans for the week and on the first Monday (which this was), plans for the month. This particular Monday also included a rescheduled call with one of our board members.
I considered taking Friday off instead. But I didn’t.
A long time coming
It’s taken a long time to get to this place.
I haven’t been one to take my birthday off. And it would be completely unheard of for me to use my precious vacation time to just do nothing.
Heck, I haven’t even been good at truly stepping away from work—not checking email or finishing that last “to do”—when I’m on PTO.
But I’m older now. And wiser. 🙄
Or maybe I’m just tired of it all. Grind culture. Corporate greed that prioritizes profits over people. The “work now, enjoy life when you retire” bullshit we’ve been fed our whole lives.
Who benefits from this? Not you. Not me.
Leadership matters
Over the years I’ve talked to countless colleagues trying to navigate personal situations alongside work. My counsel has always been the same:
Your employer does not care about you. Now granted, your boss may, but the company as an entity does not.
You should always do what’s best for you, because your company will only do what’s best for them. Don’t believe me? Look at how companies are clawing back employee benefits (gated article) right now.
I know all of this. I believe all of this. And yet I’ve still struggled to prioritize myself.
This is where leadership matters most. As leaders, we can set the example for our team. Normalize life being more important than work. Remove barriers to taking time off. Encourage and celebrate team members living their lives.
That’s what my boss did for me.
He didn’t act inconvenienced that I wasn’t going to be there. He didn’t ask me to complete and share my monthly plan before Monday—in fact, he suggested we just push it to later in the week.
There were no passive-aggressive comments. No insinuations. No guilt.
You’re going to be off? NBD, his response said.
And so I took Monday off and enjoyed a beautiful Seattle day with my equally beautiful wife.
Like it was the most normal thing to do in the world. Because even though it doesn’t always feel that way, it really should be.
PS: Happy anniversary, my love. Here’s to many more to come. ❤️
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Older. Wiser. Yay! Happy Anniversary!
Here's hoping everyone reading follows your lead! Congratulations!